What comes next...

I have wanted to write about this for a while now and have been mulling over and over what's the best way to get this across.  I don't know if this is it, but what comes next will surprise you...


it will move you to tears....

it will make you jump with joy

it will make you grow taller and become more handsome...

it will make you lose weight...

it will make, it will make, it will make!!!!

I am completely done with those headlines on Facebook and around the internet.  You know the ones that say things like "this group of middle schoolers were complete brats but what they did next will shock you" or "this group of snotty, bratty, real housewives of _____ were moved to tears by what will surprise you"  or "this poor child who has been suffering from (insert rarest form of cancer you can find) shocks the world by what comes next"...  It's the classic 'selfish soul finds redemption and goodness through the actions of others' type of stuff.  It's the feel-good story of the century.  Every single one.

Yet it all feels so manufactured. So shallow.  Right down to how we are supposed to feel and react to whatever we are reading or watching.  How could all these impromptu, amateur videos etc have such high quality editors right there to capture the moment from several angles?  Is everyone else in the world walking around with a 3-4 camera crew documenting their lives and I'm not?  If so, how are they paying for it? Oh , perhaps ever so subtle product placement?

Thankfully I do not have a camera crew, because who would want me to post daily "I was too tired after work to think about what to cook for dinner but what I did next will surprise you!" Or "watch how the Quik Trip crew quickly gave me my change and made my day while they performed a flash mob dance to my favorite song ever on my unsuspecting, quiet and reserved self."  Oh puh-lease!!!  Enough already. 

Unfortunately for me this catchphrase has become just as irritating as when you notice during someone's speech their excessive use of "ums" and then that's all you hear and then you start making hash marks for every time they say it.  Yes, I am extremely sensitive to it now.  Like nails on a chalkboard sensitive.  So much so, that I consciously try to reduce the amount of time I use Facebook or other social media.  (Exception! When using it to post this link to tell you about this posting...)

Yet I worry for those who are vulnerable to such messages dictating their reactions, their feelings.  I worry that we are manipulating people into not trusting their own feelings and their own guts.  If we don't trust them to make up their own minds about what they read or see, they won't either.  What happens then?  I don't know but what comes next won't surprise me.