Lather, Rinse, Repeat

Lather, rinse, repeat.

This is how it feels.  Except of course, I don’t do much lathering/rinsing/repeating of my hair because it continues to ‘thin’ at a high rate… The docs told me I wasn’t going to lose my hair totally but I’m not  exactly sure how much I will have left in 15 weeks (hopefully more than a few strands on my head. If not, I might have to borrow my neighbor Paul’s “flair hair” www.flairhair.com .  I’m hoping not to because it really looks better on him than me.) 

 

However, all the great interweb doctors and experts say that one’s hair starts coming back within weeks of finishing chemotherapy and usually all restored to normal within a year.  So for me, that could mean a nice thick head of hair again maybe around St. Patrick’s day?  Until then, I simply manage the best I can, picking the multitudes of strands off my black coat and feel good that I am contributing, singlehandedly, to the comfy, soft “hair pillows” the birds in my neighborhood now rest upon in their nests. 

Lather, rinse, repeat… it’s like I’m in a holding pattern. 

I’ve almost got it down to a science now.  Feel shitty Wednesday, Thursday, Friday; … slowly re-emerge as a human being Saturday and Sunday (definitely helped along when I make time to spend with friends and family);… incorporate all recovery tools, sleep (and more sleep) Monday – Friday; nest Saturday and Sunday;  dread begins to set in Monday and definitely Tuesday. Then here it is again, Chemo Wednesday and it all starts over.

BUT I am not dead, nor do I want to be.  SO the survivor of “all things trying” inside me claws her way to the surface like a phoenix and says in her best old country accent “Fuck you cancer and chemotherapy.”  (Old country accent was for you, Ladybug).

The chemo drugs are only three drugs.  I’ve got the whole universe to pull on for resources to aid in my recovery and in my cure.  My quest is to find the right combination of food, vitamins, minerals, acupuncture, zumba, sleep, and PEOPLE to bring me joy, laughter, healing and love during my 12 days off chemo so I can make it through those 48 hours on chemo. 

This is  my recovery formula, so far.  (I am always willing to take suggestions on what else to incorporate):

·         Supplements daily – B, D Vitamins, Calcium, Magnesium, Regular children’s multivitamin, Black Cohosh

·         Life Changing Smoothie  daily– that’s what it is called.  Contains carrots, spinach, kale, bananas, protein powder, almond milk, acai juice,  oatmeal, flax seed, chia seed, apples, strawberries, blueberries, raw honey  (or molasses) and cinnamon… so tasty (even my boys want their own glass).

·        Liters of warmer than room temp water daily and Senna tea, wed – Friday – must move the toxins out however I can…

·        Acupuncture as soon as I’m disconnected.  I use it to kick-off the ‘recovery’.

·        Botanical Gardens Climatron  a few times/week– me and a book and an hour in the Climatron, it can’t hurt.

·        Epsom salt mineral bath – a good hot soak to pull the toxins out starting on Friday after being disconnected.  I do those for several days in a row.

·        Daily shower with peppermint soap from Lush.  A friend told me how peppermint helps with the chemo-induced neuropathy.   I had to remind my boys that it was for me and they were to use the Dial.

·        Sleep.  I try to stay consistent but when the Cardinals were playing in the World Series, let’s just say I wasn’t as successful and I felt it!  I guess I should thank them for losing when they did so I could get ‘back on track’.

·        Dancing as much as I can handle – in my room, kitchen (even a little “car dancing” when Daft Punk comes on the radio) I zumba a few times on my off week.  The hour-long Zumba classes are some of the best group therapy on offer out there.  But that’s another entry I’ll write later.  And I’m making time (now that my port area has healed) to dance tango.

·        PEOPLE – I make dates to see my friends.  I apologize in advance to them if I repeat things during our conversation; it’s just the chemo brain talking. I have found that by making a concerted effort to schedule lunches, dinners, walks, phone calls (and Facetimes) , dances, movies, and shopping trips I have things to look forward to beyond the three days of blech and yuck.  The conversations have been amazing and fulfilling and funny and touching.  The impromptu visits or offers to meet for breakfast/lunch have been divine intervention.  They happen when I most need them but wasn’t quite aware that I did.  Make sense?  My friends and my family are the best part of my recovery  formula.  A big, giant, warm tango hug to all of you!

So in reflection, after writing this post, lather, rinse and repeat isn’t so bad after all.

xx- The Philosopher