How do I weed them out?

So I took the Sage's advice and have had a profile up on an internet dating site (and no it's not christianmingle.com).  Of course there has been interest.  A lot. This time when I filled out my profile, I was quick and to the point.  I know from experience in years past, that men don't really respond to the words you've written but more to the pictures you post.  And to have even more fun with it, I posted a few pics of my dog because most of the male profiles included at least one pic of their dog.  And I have gotten positive comments on those pictures too.

The response is incredible.  But more in a quantity not a quality way.  I have also posted my desired age range which 75% of the responders have completely ignored.  I am not ready nor interested in dating 10-15 years above my own age.  I even had a 73 year old send me a wink.  Seriously? (I doubt he was a billionaire b/c he wouldn't be needing an internet dating site to find suitable women.) I thought if I would make a note about my age preferences, those not falling into that category would leave me alone.  I was wrong.  However, I do not bother to reply to their messages or likes or winks or nudges or offers of marriage, because if they can't respect my one simple boundary of 'age preference' what other boundaries of mine will they ignore or dismiss? 

Don't get me wrong.  It's been more entertaining than a bother or a burden.  And who doesn't need something to entertain them when they're connected to a chemo bottle for 3 days out of every 14?  However, that part of my life will be over soon and I am looking forward to "Life After Cancer/Chemo" (or LAC/C if you want to shorten it.) Because as I heal, feel better, and the earth warms up I am going to want to be a social creature again.  And by using the internet dating site, I do expand my search of what's available and on offer.

However, what I haven't been able to figure out is how to weed out the effeminate men and to avoid even going on one date with them.  I have had three such lunch dates and each time, I'm thinking "how does he know he's not gay??"  I know, I know there are straight men who are effeminate but they are not my type.  I need, want, and desire a man. One whose balls are bigger than mine! One who when he looks at me there is such a passion and desire on his face and I can tell he's thinking about what he's going to do to me later versus he really likes my outfit.  I'm a strong woman and I need to be matched with a strong man.  I know that.  But somehow I haven't asked the right questions beforehand or something...

And I don't wish to be rude when we are at lunch or coffee or having a quick drink by blurting out "are you sure you're not gay?"  Fortunately, I have been able to control my chemo brain in those instances.

So what do I ask?  How can I weed them out?  Any and all suggestions are welcome.


1/27/14 Hilarious update: Went to a first date brunch yesterday and yet again, another man who gave me the gay vibes.  This one though wasn't effeminate but he goes to the gym 5 days a week - no other "hobbies", had an earring in one ear and although attractive, it just felt like he was covering up his gayness by going on dates with women.  He was nice but I won't see him again.  So the saga and the search continues... at least it's fun and entertaining (for my readers as well!).